The dangerous streets of Irvine.

I was planning on writing a big long blog about this weekend's events but I decided that since I had a conversation about it with someone while I began writing it, I might as well just copy, paste, and censor it here. Beware! You may be compelled to move after reading this entry... scary stuff man.

MK (12:13:03 AM): I have to ask, how is woodbridge scary...?
Lacey (12:13:12 AM): OH MY GOSH
Lacey (12:13:24 AM): do you really want to know? you might be too afraid to leave your house...
MK (12:13:32 AM): haha, im intrigued, yes
MK (12:14:02 AM): what could be so scary in woodbridge...?
Lacey (12:14:06 AM): okay
MK (12:14:16 AM): too much sameness?
Lacey (12:14:20 AM): it all began on a friday night like any other
Lacey (12:14:21 AM): no no no
Lacey (12:14:35 AM): this weekend has shown me that no town, even irvine is truly sheltered
MK (12:14:38 AM): it was a calm and quite friday night in Irvine C*********..
MK (12:14:43 AM): yeesh ok
MK (12:14:45 AM): splain
Lacey (12:14:56 AM): k.
Lacey (12:15:11 AM): so i was at "dj ****'s" party
MK (12:15:22 AM): right..
Lacey (12:15:29 AM): (i only recently discovered that he is called "dj ****" in all seriousness, i find it funny.)
MK (12:16:02 AM): anyone who calls himself that needs to be laughed at
Lacey (12:16:02 AM): anyway, so i get to his house, music's blasting, marijuana's burning, alcohol is being consumed
Lacey (12:16:07 AM): ya know, a "normal high school party."
MK (12:16:10 AM): right
Lacey (12:16:32 AM): there was a whole lot of annoying drama going on and slutty dancers all over the place, so i stayed outside most of the night with my sober friends
Lacey (12:17:11 AM): fortunately, my curfew had been shortened to 11:30 on this particular evening because i was being punished for being late all the time
MK (12:17:22 AM): haha alright
Lacey (12:17:36 AM): so i left at 11:20, driving like crazy to make it home on time. the moment i arrive home i receive a text message
Lacey (12:17:41 AM): "someone just got stabbed!"
Lacey (12:17:43 AM): it reads
MK (12:17:49 AM): ...
Lacey (12:17:54 AM): i get online to talk to the person who sent me the text
Lacey (12:18:12 AM): she didn't know anything other than the fact that a huge fight had broken out at the party and someone got stabbed in the eye
MK (12:18:20 AM): whoa
MK (12:18:25 AM): who stabs someone in the eye..
Lacey(12:18:37 AM): the next day i find out that that was not the only abnormal thing that had occured on this fateful evening.
Lacey (12:18:40 AM): (i know seriously!)
Lacey (12:18:55 AM): turns out the kid wasn't stabbed IN the eye, just in the general vacinity of the eye. the face, if you will.
MK (12:18:57 AM): this was in woodbridge?
Lacey (12:18:58 AM): yes.
MK (12:19:20 AM): pathetic.
Lacey (12:19:30 AM): so it turns out that TWO kids were stabbed, there were TWO huge brawls, someone got hit by a car, and a girl went to the hospital from alcohol poisoning.
Lacey (12:19:47 AM): this same evening my friend B** got in a car accident
Lacey (12:19:57 AM): the next day he sprained/broke his ankle
MK (12:20:10 AM): unrelated to the accident?
Lacey (12:20:20 AM): yes, unrelated
Lacey (12:20:23 AM): totally different accident
Lacey (12:20:24 AM): BUT
Lacey (12:20:34 AM): also friday night (in utah) my friend is at a dance party...
Lacey (12:20:37 AM): AND THE FLOOR CAVES IN
MK (12:20:47 AM): hot damn
Lacey (12:20:52 AM): but no no, that's not all that has occured this weekend.
Lacey (12:21:15 AM): tonight i'm at my friend's house playing Guitar Hero and eating chocolate chip cookies when i receive a call from my concerned mother telling me not to come home
Lacey (12:21:45 AM): apparently a criminal was on the loose in our neighborhood and there were helicopters and cop cars and everything all over the place
MK (12:22:03 AM): what no way..
Lacey (12:22:18 AM): anyone who claims woodbridge is safe is sincerely mistaken. it is just as prone to hysteria as any other small-town community.
MK (12:22:32 AM): lol, i think ur overreacting a bit
Lacey (12:22:36 AM): haha
Lacey (12:22:49 AM): well, i'm making myself sound dramatic for... effect.
MK (12:22:55 AM): haha
MK (12:22:56 AM): i know
Lacey (12:22:56 AM): but it's been a really weird weekend.
MK (12:23:06 AM): yeah that is for sure
MK (12:23:17 AM): do u know how the whole fugitive thing went down?
MK (12:23:35 AM): did they catch him?
Lacey (12:23:40 AM): when i finally came home all the cop cars were on m***/**** yale ****
Lacey (12:23:50 AM): i'm pretty sure they must have because there were a ton of them all there
MK (12:23:57 AM): i see
MK (12:24:20 AM): irvine cops finally earning all that cash.
MK (12:25:06 AM): so did the stabbing kids go to whs?
MK (12:25:30 AM): either the stabbers or stabees?
MK (12:25:32 AM): lol
Lacey (12:25:48 AM): i know haha
MK (12:26:02 AM): ?
Lacey (12:26:04 AM): well apparently the fights involved kids from uni who invade all the woodbridge parties to get into fights
Lacey (12:26:18 AM): all i know is the kid who was stabbed in the face's name was ***.
MK (12:26:28 AM): thats a very stabbable name
MK (12:26:29 AM): figures
MK (12:27:03 AM): don't uni kids have anything better to do? Like, math problems or something?
MK (12:27:46 AM): god humans are so dumb
Lacey (12:28:32 AM): haha
Lacey (12:28:33 AM): seriously.
Lacey (12:28:41 AM): i just don't understand...
MK (12:28:57 AM): i'll never be able to comprehend such behavior
MK (12:29:26 AM): and I will always wish I had the power to sterilize people with the snap of my fingers
MK (12:30:00 AM): sadly, however, those kids will probably procreate one day soon, when they knock up some drunk chick at a party, and the cycle will continue.

^Well put MK, well put.^


* Names have been changed to protect the identities of mentioned people and places in the story.